Was wir nicht alles tun für die Mwnschen die wir lieben. Auch wenn sie uns wie Dreck behandeln.

I'm happy to be myself

No. I just can't say it.
I'm happy to be alive.
I'm happy about the fact that i live in Germany. I'm happy cause I'm healthy. I'm happy that my sister is safe.
But I'm not happy to be myself. I'm not satisfied with my life. I don't know what I want. I'm confused, angry and lonley.
Still lonely.
Today my 'friend' told me I was cruel to my baby-dog. Me! The only thing I really like in the whole world are dogs! And she said I was cruel! Although she has no idea how to handle a dog! She told me I was wrong with what I was doing! She broke the one rule. She critizised me about that. And that's something I really can't stand.
I'm lonley again. I guess I'm not good in making friends. I always choose the wrong person I give my heart to. I'm so done with that.

Faking it

Ich soll meine Gefühle niederschreiben. Weil mir das gut tut. Weil meine Hexen das gesagt haben.
Also versuchen wir es. Was solls.
Ich liebe Faking it.
Es spricht mich an. Auf so viele Arten.
Ich weiß nicht was ich fühle. Immer noch nicht. Woher auch. Was weiß ich schon vom verliebt sein.